Whooo- *collapses*

[beandelphiki]

Thanks to siegeengine and mhw, who wished me a happy birthday! *beams*

Oh yeah...it was my birthday Monday. I'm 20.

I don't want to think about it. I'm oooold!

SO much homework. Going to bed.

Comments

Re: hi

[siegeengine.livejournal.com]

Psychiatrist. hrr... so sneaky of me to just throw that in there off hand-like. *smacks back of hand*

Anyway... this guy... he knows next to nothing about me, has never asked anything about me except to hear me *start* to explain symptoms before he interrupts me to change (up) my meds. For some reason, in the middle of one of my flash 3 minute sessions, he stops and says, "what are you thinking about?"

So, of course I wouldn't answer him. I said, oh, nothing... but he persisted. So I said.. eh..it's a long story.. nothing big. But for some reason he continued to pry as if he actually wanted to know what was going on in my head! so strange!

Anyway, I end up telling him my whole life story essentially from just before I met you to today, and he comes out with, "That's kind of unrealistic of you, isn't it?" I say I suppose, and he says, well, I want to see you back in my office in 3 weeks... (when just before I told him the story he told me he wanted to see me in a month) and then he says, "If you're not over this by then, then I think I"m going to up your risperdal."

So basically, if I'm not "over" you in 3 weeks (I have about 6 days left) then he's going to double my antipsychotics! Oh and yes, yes, the irony is killing me. ;)))))))))))

Anti-psychotics is such a perjorative name, I think. I prefer "neuroleptics" because they do more than just treat psychosis. In my case, I'm on them because of my obsessive compulsive tendencies... in that specifically, I tend to obsess when I'm not on the med that people in stores want me to leave and dislike me in general, or that cars behind me are actually following me. He's told me that I'm not psychotic, because I realize that those thoughts are not true, but that I'm just plagued with obsessive thoughts which came about from events in my past.

Um... anyway...
that's why.

strange.

Sorry to spill all of that on you. I...

I don't know if you noticed... but I was trying not to have any contact with you because my doc told me I was only having an obsession.

I'm not sure if I'm right, and I'm ok, or if he's right, and I'm not ok. er... all of this makes my head spin.

neways, it's 430am... time to hit the hay.
sorry again about the birthday present.

me.

Re: hi

[siegeengine.livejournal.com]

shit. I'd edit the italics, but that would just double up the message.
Chalk one up for the other side.