"We don't like dealing with domestic problems. The fur can really fly."

[beandelphiki]

Today on the bus ride home, this woman brought a dog on the bus. This is worth noting because I've never seen a dog on the bus before. I know they can come on, for a fee (guide dogs exempt), but not in all the years I've been riding public transit (3), have I actually seen a dog on the bus.

I don't know much about dogs, so I couldn't say if it was any particular breed, but it looked like a cross between a Dalmatian and a black Labrador. I'm not very fond of dogs (childhood doggy trauma does that to you), but I like Labs for their open, expressive faces. The woman who brought him on (who looked a bit like a cross between Andy Dick and Barbra Walters herself) kept it on a leash, and it was very well-behaved. (Not knowing the dog's gender, I'm gonna default to the more demographically likely possibility, here.) He was wearing those saddle-bag things you can strap on dogs, and I thought that was quite unfair. You wouldn't catch me wearing a backpack if I didn't have to in heat like this, and I don't have a fur coat. He had a little sign strapped on him, too, but I couldn't see exactly what it said because the woman's leg was in the way - all I could make out around her calf was, "VICE DOG."

I knew it wasn't a cop dog, because they sniff everything, so I kept trying to imagine what the sign said. I kept seeing, "ADVICE DOG," which almost made me laugh right out loud on the bus because it made me think of Ralph from "Callahan's Place." I could just see this dog with his own radio advice show: "Look lady, if you don't ditch this hound, I'm telling you he's gonna drop YOU for a real fox, and then where will you be? If you really love this other one, then go with him. Just because he isn't a thoroughbred, doesn't mean he's worth less than the real SOB you're with now. He's just sniffing around you because he smells money, and he'll use you. Take a chance on the mutt and follow your heart."

Turns out the sign said, "SERVICE DOG." Oh, well.

Speaking of people who laugh out loud on the bus, I just hate that. Sitting quietly on the bus listening to someone else cackling is about as much fun as listening to someone's cell phone ring in the movie theatre.

The Transit people look so grumpy all the time, but then, I know I wouldn't even have half the patience they do. I'd get fired the first day I ever worked as a bus driver because I'd buy my own portable speaker system, and spend bus rides snapping ito it, "So, you wanna get a life back there, or what?"

Comments

[wrdgrrl.livejournal.com]

I was drawn to your Eminem icon in groovycat's journal and came to check you out. I really like that you have a link to your friends' policy on your bio page. I might have to copy that idea. It'll spare me the trauma of having to explain it over and over again.

"Advice Dog"

Heh heh.

[beandelphiki.livejournal.com]

Sigh...only problem is, the people who really should read it don't seem to.

Thanks.

-Dan

Dogs on the bus

[(Anonymous)]

Once I was on the 3 or something and this lady came on with her dog, do i pitted her (the dog) and my palm got covered in wet fur, that was pretty great (If only because I said to everyone on the bus "Dad, it grew back")
-Stephen