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beandelphikiBah! I meant, as I said, to get back to people's comments and such either Sunday or Monday. Naturally, there was then storming in my area! At one point on Sunday, the mall I work at was apparently trying to EVACUATE people! WTF?! I don't know if that was related to the ongoing storm at all or not, but I find it pretty funny that nobody in the food court heard the apparently urgent warnings going on over the loudspeaker, thanks to the usual din.
Okay, so...I went and got that ultrasound done this morning. We were nearly late (badbadbad, they only JUST squeezed me in because of the cancer concern) because I fell asleep last night without turning on my alarm (and had to have Mom practically drag me out of bed) and then spent a good part of the morning Googling breast ultrasounds because it occurred to us a bit late to wonder if it was okay for me to eat, take caffeine pills (because I'm on med holiday today), etc.
We decided it was okay for me to eat something small, so I did...but several sites said, "Do not put any lotions or powders on your breasts." Mom figured that would also apply to armpits, so I shouldn't put on deodorant, either. So I shaved instead, which I haven't done in, um, a while...I seem to remember that your skin needs to get used to the whole shaving deal, and I think I have the butchered armpits to prove it. Owwwwie!
But we were on time. They called me by my birth name when they called me in, which was pretty much inevitable...since although the forms SAY "Daniel," they also say I'm getting a breast ultrasound and teh_boobies = female. I'd geared myself up to say, "Dan, actually," but didn't. I never do.
(Oh, and the tech who did my exam also kept gently calling me, "sweetheart," but I didn't mind that so much as find it terribly amusing.)
So, I changed into a blue gown ("open to the front," although I don't think it's possible to put it on any other way - I assume the green ones in the same room were for "open to the back," HAH) in a small adjoining room, and then the tech came and got me. It took quite a while - from the sounds of it, there was a lot of stuff she had to adjust about the equipment.
And then she called me, and had me put the room key for the change room on a table that had a sheet on it. I sort of thought, "Um...dude, they even put sheets on the tables?" Like, what could you catch from a key that had touched the table that someone else put another key on or something...weird.
And there was a bed, and a filing cabinet, and all the equipment, and besides that, barely room to move. It was kind of cozy, in a strange, medicalized way.
She had me lie down on my back, and asked me about the skin changes I'd noticed, and then opened my gown so I could point to the spots I was worried about. She asked me about the location (underside, more to the inside)...but I could tell that she could SEE what was wrong for herself, because she traced the area with one finger, and I know from the experience of tracing the outline myself that she was bang-on. I told her about the pitting at the hair follicles, and pointed out that the skin is much thicker in that area. She did a quick comparison look at the left breast, and then we started.
She had me lie on my left side so that my right breast was flatter, and put my right arm over my head, and then carefully covered everything else, which amused me. I wanted to assure her that I'm really not that shy, but never did...I just figured perhaps I could reassure her a bit by being very nonchalant about the whole thing. Which seemed to work.
And even though she said, "We'll start with some warm gel," I was still a bit shocked when she squeezed it out of the tube onto my breast and it was the temperature of a lukewarm bath. Somehow, I just expected it to be cold. (Although, exposed to air, I can say that it does eventually chill down noticeably...more on the left side, because she didn't go over the non-troublesome breast as thoroughly. I'm guessing friction keeps the stuff warm...?)
I was facing away from the computer screen for the right breast and so spent most of the time staring at the ceiling, going slightly numb from the position (NOT the most comfortable!), and playing my fingers in the air whenever it was somewhat uncomfortable...being one of those kids who spent YEARS getting wires and metal put in and taken out of my mouth, I think I'm pretty good right now at remaining still and relaxed during uncomfortable and even painful procedures.
Although there WERE two spots where it really hurt when she pressed - the lower inside (problem spot) and the upper, outer quarter diagonal to it, almost into my armpit. I winced and probably yelped almost every time she pressed hard in those spots, and she kept wincing in response and saying, "Sorry. I'm sorry."
...Which bothered me because it seemed like maybe she thought she was pressing too hard or something. So after the fourth or fifth time she said it, I said, "It's really not your fault if it hurts, you know."
She said, "Oh, I know! But I always feel so bad for the patients when it hurts."
Awww. Too cute.
We spent an exceedingly long time on the right side. She'd warned me that she'd spend more time on that side, but when we switched and I rolled over, the entire left breast probably didn't take more than 3 or 4 minutes. So for a 20-minute exam, that was quite a discrepancy.
I was facing the screen for the left breast, though, so I watched as closely as I could. Much to my general frustration, I didn't REALLY understand enough of what I was seeing to guess if it was all totally normal, although I'm fairly sure I could pick out muscles and things. I noted that every time she punched a particular button on her keyboard, there was a beep, and the picture froze on one side of the screen or the other. Then, often, she'd spend some time matching one image up to another, beep, freeze the second image, start over. It was mildly perplexing, although I'm wondering if perhaps the match-ups aren't meant to all fit together to create a sort of 3-D image.
When we were done, and I'd cleaned thegoo gel off my chest and was fastening my gown again, I asked, "So when it beeps and you freeze the image...is that temporary, or does that make a permanent picture?"
"It makes a permanent picture. See, I take a picture of everything...and then if I see something, I take extra pictures of that."
"Mmmm." I knew from listening to the beeps that she had taken many, MANY pictures on the right side. Far more than the left. Many.
Obligatory, because it was the "problem" breast? Or was there something there to take pictures of?
...And then on the way out after changing, I (amusingly) got somewhat turned around and lost because there were several different "exit" signs all pointing in different directions (!), and I didn't know which one I'd ENTERED the area from. Hah. But I figured it out - yay for glass doors.
So, a largely painless experience. I was told by the nice tech lady, "Your doctor should receive these results in one to two work days." *snorts* Since Dr. H only works Tuesdays and Fridays, I won't hear anything for a bit.
Something very disturbing happened when I got home, though...my whole chest started to hurt, but mostly around my right breast, and ESPECIALLY around the upper-outer section and my armpit. It was to the point that I was unable to lift my arm, and getting waves of nausea.
Thankfully, it seems to have eased off. I had a bad night last night - I kept waking up because lying on my right side hurt - and I'm thinking this may have been the source of pain. (I was assuming it was my lungs again.) I'm pretty worried about how serious this might be.
I discovered when I pressed around the area that poking it hurt a LOT...but a check by touch and with the aid of mirror found no swelling, so hopefully that's a good sign.
Aaaand, it's better now. So I guess I'll just wait and see. Until whatever-this-is is diagnosed, I don't know what else I could do.
In the meantime, though, I REALLY need to stop writing. I AM SO OBSESSIVE, I SWEAR. I promised myself when I started writing this in Word at noon or so that I would make it short to save my poor, pained arm/chest.
Instead, I have typed out the whole damn thing, one bloody sentence at a time. (Write...rest. Write...rest.) I'm insane. But I got the whole pointless story down, go me!
And in better news...I misplaced my rescue inhaler yesterday, but found it again today. Whew! ...Okay, so maybe it's not good news that my asthma is acting up enough that I fretted over not being able to find the Ventolin for 24 hours, but finding it...that was good!
Going to go have ice cream. Will get back to stuff again later, when I've had some rest.
Okay, so...I went and got that ultrasound done this morning. We were nearly late (badbadbad, they only JUST squeezed me in because of the cancer concern) because I fell asleep last night without turning on my alarm (and had to have Mom practically drag me out of bed) and then spent a good part of the morning Googling breast ultrasounds because it occurred to us a bit late to wonder if it was okay for me to eat, take caffeine pills (because I'm on med holiday today), etc.
We decided it was okay for me to eat something small, so I did...but several sites said, "Do not put any lotions or powders on your breasts." Mom figured that would also apply to armpits, so I shouldn't put on deodorant, either. So I shaved instead, which I haven't done in, um, a while...I seem to remember that your skin needs to get used to the whole shaving deal, and I think I have the butchered armpits to prove it. Owwwwie!
But we were on time. They called me by my birth name when they called me in, which was pretty much inevitable...since although the forms SAY "Daniel," they also say I'm getting a breast ultrasound and teh_boobies = female. I'd geared myself up to say, "Dan, actually," but didn't. I never do.
(Oh, and the tech who did my exam also kept gently calling me, "sweetheart," but I didn't mind that so much as find it terribly amusing.)
So, I changed into a blue gown ("open to the front," although I don't think it's possible to put it on any other way - I assume the green ones in the same room were for "open to the back," HAH) in a small adjoining room, and then the tech came and got me. It took quite a while - from the sounds of it, there was a lot of stuff she had to adjust about the equipment.
And then she called me, and had me put the room key for the change room on a table that had a sheet on it. I sort of thought, "Um...dude, they even put sheets on the tables?" Like, what could you catch from a key that had touched the table that someone else put another key on or something...weird.
And there was a bed, and a filing cabinet, and all the equipment, and besides that, barely room to move. It was kind of cozy, in a strange, medicalized way.
She had me lie down on my back, and asked me about the skin changes I'd noticed, and then opened my gown so I could point to the spots I was worried about. She asked me about the location (underside, more to the inside)...but I could tell that she could SEE what was wrong for herself, because she traced the area with one finger, and I know from the experience of tracing the outline myself that she was bang-on. I told her about the pitting at the hair follicles, and pointed out that the skin is much thicker in that area. She did a quick comparison look at the left breast, and then we started.
She had me lie on my left side so that my right breast was flatter, and put my right arm over my head, and then carefully covered everything else, which amused me. I wanted to assure her that I'm really not that shy, but never did...I just figured perhaps I could reassure her a bit by being very nonchalant about the whole thing. Which seemed to work.
And even though she said, "We'll start with some warm gel," I was still a bit shocked when she squeezed it out of the tube onto my breast and it was the temperature of a lukewarm bath. Somehow, I just expected it to be cold. (Although, exposed to air, I can say that it does eventually chill down noticeably...more on the left side, because she didn't go over the non-troublesome breast as thoroughly. I'm guessing friction keeps the stuff warm...?)
I was facing away from the computer screen for the right breast and so spent most of the time staring at the ceiling, going slightly numb from the position (NOT the most comfortable!), and playing my fingers in the air whenever it was somewhat uncomfortable...being one of those kids who spent YEARS getting wires and metal put in and taken out of my mouth, I think I'm pretty good right now at remaining still and relaxed during uncomfortable and even painful procedures.
Although there WERE two spots where it really hurt when she pressed - the lower inside (problem spot) and the upper, outer quarter diagonal to it, almost into my armpit. I winced and probably yelped almost every time she pressed hard in those spots, and she kept wincing in response and saying, "Sorry. I'm sorry."
...Which bothered me because it seemed like maybe she thought she was pressing too hard or something. So after the fourth or fifth time she said it, I said, "It's really not your fault if it hurts, you know."
She said, "Oh, I know! But I always feel so bad for the patients when it hurts."
Awww. Too cute.
We spent an exceedingly long time on the right side. She'd warned me that she'd spend more time on that side, but when we switched and I rolled over, the entire left breast probably didn't take more than 3 or 4 minutes. So for a 20-minute exam, that was quite a discrepancy.
I was facing the screen for the left breast, though, so I watched as closely as I could. Much to my general frustration, I didn't REALLY understand enough of what I was seeing to guess if it was all totally normal, although I'm fairly sure I could pick out muscles and things. I noted that every time she punched a particular button on her keyboard, there was a beep, and the picture froze on one side of the screen or the other. Then, often, she'd spend some time matching one image up to another, beep, freeze the second image, start over. It was mildly perplexing, although I'm wondering if perhaps the match-ups aren't meant to all fit together to create a sort of 3-D image.
When we were done, and I'd cleaned the
"It makes a permanent picture. See, I take a picture of everything...and then if I see something, I take extra pictures of that."
"Mmmm." I knew from listening to the beeps that she had taken many, MANY pictures on the right side. Far more than the left. Many.
Obligatory, because it was the "problem" breast? Or was there something there to take pictures of?
...And then on the way out after changing, I (amusingly) got somewhat turned around and lost because there were several different "exit" signs all pointing in different directions (!), and I didn't know which one I'd ENTERED the area from. Hah. But I figured it out - yay for glass doors.
So, a largely painless experience. I was told by the nice tech lady, "Your doctor should receive these results in one to two work days." *snorts* Since Dr. H only works Tuesdays and Fridays, I won't hear anything for a bit.
Something very disturbing happened when I got home, though...my whole chest started to hurt, but mostly around my right breast, and ESPECIALLY around the upper-outer section and my armpit. It was to the point that I was unable to lift my arm, and getting waves of nausea.
Thankfully, it seems to have eased off. I had a bad night last night - I kept waking up because lying on my right side hurt - and I'm thinking this may have been the source of pain. (I was assuming it was my lungs again.) I'm pretty worried about how serious this might be.
I discovered when I pressed around the area that poking it hurt a LOT...but a check by touch and with the aid of mirror found no swelling, so hopefully that's a good sign.
Aaaand, it's better now. So I guess I'll just wait and see. Until whatever-this-is is diagnosed, I don't know what else I could do.
In the meantime, though, I REALLY need to stop writing. I AM SO OBSESSIVE, I SWEAR. I promised myself when I started writing this in Word at noon or so that I would make it short to save my poor, pained arm/chest.
Instead, I have typed out the whole damn thing, one bloody sentence at a time. (Write...rest. Write...rest.) I'm insane. But I got the whole pointless story down, go me!
And in better news...I misplaced my rescue inhaler yesterday, but found it again today. Whew! ...Okay, so maybe it's not good news that my asthma is acting up enough that I fretted over not being able to find the Ventolin for 24 hours, but finding it...that was good!
Going to go have ice cream. Will get back to stuff again later, when I've had some rest.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-12 09:57 am (UTC)... not that that means anything, just for perspective, because I've accompanied lots of people for diagnostic procedures over the years.
*hugs*
still, I hope everything is going to be perfectly fine. I wish you didn't have so much pain all of the time. It seems like they should be able to fix your lung issues somehow. *shows obvious ignorance*
*more hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-14 07:26 am (UTC)I wish you didn't have so much pain all of the time. It seems like they should be able to fix your lung issues somehow. *shows obvious ignorance*
Aw, I'm not really in pain ALL the time, and it's really not that severe, as things go. I'm generally okay with it; it's deal-able, y'know.
The lungs, yeah...I haven't actually had a pneuo in quite a while (I think?), but I KNOW they aren't "okay." That whole issue is sort of in limbo right now, because I don't know what else could be done. Maybe nothing.
BUT because my asthma is acting up again, I now have another inhaler - a non-rescue type, a steriod inhaler. Which is the same kind I was given to help stop the pneuos from popping up. So maybe that will help.
*shrugs* *accepts your hugs* :)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-14 10:26 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-15 06:09 am (UTC)According to the information sheets that came with my inhalers, the difference IS in the type of spray - some chemical in it, I think? - that they got rid of because it wrecks the ozone layer.
*shrug*